Gay Marriage - Mahalia

Marriage has been around for centuries but only for opposite-sex couples.  In the last couple decades same-sex marriages is not being viewed as just a taboo thing like it was at one point in time. “Most commonly, dictionaries define marriage in terms of spouses, spouses in terms of husband and wife, and husband and wife in terms of marriage…what marriage is and so simply end up assuming or stipulating that marriage must be between people of different sexes,” Richard Mohr (Bolte p.25).  In the last forty years the U.S. has nearly fifty percent of all opposite-sex marriages ending in divorce and it is said that gay marriages last longer (Masci). Gay marriage is also not looked happily upon be many religious groups for many reasons. Gay marriage goes against the churches beliefs, sacred texts like the bible and the traditions that each religious group has (ProCon). If the United States allowed all fifty states to allow same-sex couples to marry, than it would forces the churches to marry same-sex couples. Young kids would start thinking it alright that the same-sex marries and every tradition that has been around will cease to no longer exist (Dolan p.2).  If people started thinking that it’s alright to go against all beliefs to be with the same-sex, than it would be alright if gay married couples to get marriage benefits right? Marriage benefits where really only designed for opposite sex couples; which included claiming tax exemption for spouse, receive social security on a love one and receiving health insurance policy (ProCon).  By allowing the same sex couples to receive the same benefits as opposite couples would put the U.S. in more debt by millions. With the rate of Gay marriage going up more children will not be raised with a mother and father. In some studies it shows that children raised without one parent has an effect on how they will turn out (ProCon).  It may not be the best thing when gay people start making their own culture with a new vibrant feel. What most people don’t understand is marriage is not a right. The reason marriage was created to discourage same-sex couples in society and not give them any benefits (ProCon).  Marriage should not be allowed to same-sex couples because it would shift the purpose of marriage. There may be a lot of things why same sex couples should not get married but everyone has the right to life, liberty and pursuit of happiness so what makes gay people different? I believe that all fifty states should legalize gay marriage.

“Marriage provides the ultimate form of acceptance for personal, intimate relationships in our society, and gives those who marry an insider status of the most powerful kind,” (Ettelbrick p.20).  Today a relationship is not official until its Facebook official and back than if you were not married than your relationship was not as valid as someone who was (Ettelbrick p.20). Every couple wants approval from the spouse’s mom or dad or society in general, so I think that is a big reason way gay or lesbian couples want to marry because they will feel more excepted. Every day is a fight in America if you are gay or lesbian; they have to fight for their rights and the happiness that they want/ deserve. When a gay or lesbian want to get married they might as well just try to buy a country because the laws in America don’t make it easy for them to marry and get the same rights as straight married couples. Back in the 70’s when gay people married they didn’t get the same benefits as an opposite marriage did (Stoddard p.15). I don’t see anything wrong with two people that are in love wanting to tie the knot. Some people say that the only reason a gay couple would want to marry is because in today’s world same-sex couples get the some benefits at least more than they had not married but not as many as opposite sex couples. I believe in some instances couples only marry for the benefits but for majority of the gay community it’s because it’s just the natural next step to take in a relationship. So gay marriage is not much different than opposite sex couple so why can’t gay couples walk down the street to city hall and marry when they want?

The history behind same-sex marriage is long but as time passes slowly but surely gays and lesbians are getting more rights. In the 20’s it was taboo to hear about gay couples in the United States because they kept a low profile politically and social (Jost, Gay Marriage Showdowns). By the 70’s gay and lesbians started identifying themselves because of the gay rights movement. By the 90’s the movement act focused just on marriage because there were right gay couples would gain if they got marriage legalized.  In 1997 the movement to legalize gay marriage in America took a turn for the good because Hawaii was the first state to recognize same-sex couples (Jost, Gay Marriage Showdowns). Three years later Vermont decided to join Hawaii in legalizing gay marriage and not long after that eight other states across the U.S. got on board and started recognized same-sex couples. With the public being more understanding more and more gay couples not being afraid of come out the rights movement was making head way. About 85,000 same-sex couples have already gained legal recognition since 1997 (Jost, Gay Marriage Showdowns). Even though only ten states have legalized I believe it’s only a matter of time before the rest of the states legalize. As of September 2012 eleven out of hundred and ninety-four countries allow gays to marry. Even thought that there are not a lot of supporting countries it’s only a matter of time because this movement was inevitably and I don’t think every county will legalize but majority will with time.

Like ever situation there is a pro side. Gay marriage was over looked by the media for years until about the early 90’s. When the gay rights movement was pushing to get marriage legalized it brought a lot of attention to the causes and in some way helping get the word out to others across the U.S (Jost, Gay-Rights Update). The gay rights movement wouldn’t want any back lashing for gay and lesbian kids in high school so they are also push for support groups across the U.S. in schools. This has not got a lot of attention but right now it’s in only 700 schools and will continue to grow. The rights groups wanted to also eliminate bullying at a young age so gay/ lesbians will be more accepted with the coming up generations (Jost, Gay-Rights Update).

Legalizing gay marriage is not an easy process to do especially in America. The rights of gays started and end with the legislature (Gilreath p.107). With the gay rights movement pushing to legalize gay marriage in every state they have lots of obstacles they have to bypass first. The status on gay rights may be controlled be the legislature but political parties play a big role in the legislature decision. The way the Senate interprets the Federal Marriage Amendment is “Marriage in the United States shall consist only of the union of a man and a woman. Neither this Constitution, nor the constitution, nor there constitution of any State, shall be construed to require that marriage or the legal incidents thereof be conferred upon any union other than the union of a man and a woman,” (Gilreath p.107). The Senate version didn’t even get the two-third votes required by the constitution. The Senate and House versions had similarities but they still had the idea that the constitution should be limited to certain individuals (Gilreath p.108) In Massachusetts in order for a gay couple to get married they have several requirements they have to pass in order to marry (Gilreath p.109). Today only ten states consider gay marriage valid. It’s not an easy battle for gays and lesbians but they don’t give up faith and continue to fight for their voice to be heard. Everyone wants a chance to have equal rights but the constitution is not just black and white and either is the law.

The constitution was made in the 1800’s which was over two hundred years ago and I don’t believe the founding fathers had gay marriage on the brain when writing the document. The founding fathers did how ever put in the first amendment gives every person in America the right to freedom (Gilreath p.110). How I interpret that statement is that if a gay or lesbian couple wanted to marry than they should have those rights. The constitution plays a big role in helping gays and lesbians across the U.S. (Gilreath p.111). A persons constitutional rights include living there life’s free from government interference and in many cases this does not happen. Even when gays and lesbians rights are violated they don’t always get justice. The constitution its self was made to help individuals in America and even though sometimes people overlook the constitution it has good intention for all, gay or straight.

Legalizing marriage is harder because of federal laws that still keep gay and lesbian married couple’s rights different from straight couples (Jost, Gay Marriage). In section three of the Federal Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) the federal government sees marriage between a man and woman. It doesn’t even matter is a gay or lesbian couple marry and people in their home down consider/ recognized by others, it still does not let the gay couple get marriage benefits in the federal law. So in any of the ten states gay married couples can take advantage of marriage benefits as long as the federal law does not provide them. There is over thousand laws that gay couple can’t don’t get a chance to receive. Examples are social security, tax benefits, employee health and retirement benefits are just some that gay marriages can’t use to their benefit (Jost, Gay Marriage).

Another controversy is between civil unions vs. gay marriage (Debate). What is civil union? How does it affect gay marriage? Sometimes there is no right or wrong side and everyone has different views. Between ever controversy there are many questions and sometimes answers are not as easy as yes or no. These are two complex subjects and each has people backing them because they stand for something. Before I read much about civil unions I believed that it was a bill that was out there to help gay marriage couples (Debate). It was made just for same-sex couples and it had benefits that only none straight couples had access to. I also do see why that civil unions and gay marriage would have any reason to not get along because they are one the same sided right?

After reading about civil unions, I see why most gay and lesbian couples are against it. Civil union is just another name for marriage or that’s what they want people to believe. Civil union is an alternative for marriage so the government doesn’t have to pay the benefits they would if they considered gay couples (Debate). The purpose of civil unions was to let gays and lesbians have equal rights as opposite sex couples without changing marriage rights. Civil unions are separate, but not equal. Civil unions like to give the appearances that separate arrangements than marriage can have equal benefits (Debate). But have we not learned anything from history; Jim Crows laws where a lot like civil unions but in the end failed because separate can never be equal. Gay marriage has every right to dislike civil unions because they limit the power gay couples have (Debate). Gay and lesbians deserve to be equal with opposite sex couple in every way. Civil unions would never give gay couples a real chance at equal rights no matter what history has taught us Americans. If gay marriages continue to fight like blacks did when they were being mistreated than I say in the next couple decade’s gays and lesbians will have equal rights.

We the people are living in a new generation and that generation is more excepting than in the past on gay marriage. Even gays and lesbians are feeling more comfortable on coming out and voicing who they are. In the last four years people in the military are sick of having to be something they are not, so even the people in the military are standing up against the government (Katel). I believe that people are born gay not made that way. Sexual identities are complex and for gay and lesbians they have more pressure to trying to fit in by the way they dress or walk or even talk (Seidman p.9). I think everyone should have equal rights and that means gay marriage having all the benefits that opposite-sex couple have. Gay rights movement has been going on for years to help gays and lesbians get their voices heard. Being gay or lesbian is a daily struggle not just in the U.S. but around the world; only eleven out of hundred and ninety-four countries allow gays to marry and only ten states out of fifty states to allow gay marriage. I think that everyone should have the right to get married and get the benefits that comes with marriage no matter who the partner sex is. I would consider myself a religious person but I don’t find that there is anything wrong with gay marriages taking place in churches. I know that some people would not agree with my point of view and some pastors would not like being forced to marry a couple that goes against everything they believe in, so if that were to happen the pastor has all rights to reject. I think that the U.S. should legalize gay marriage in all fifty states but the church has the right to not allow same-sex couples to marry in that church. Even if people believe that gay couples are going to go to hell because of their sin than it’s their choice and they are going to have to live with their choices, not others. I also think that god would not punish a person because of who they love; god is more likely to punish a guy who kills someone over someone who fell in love with the same-sex. If America has not learned from its mistakes by now, than I understand why gay and lesbians don’t support civil unions. All people deserve a right at equal rights gay, straight, single or married does not matter because we live in America. Every person has a right to have a chance at life and that goes for those who marry the same-sex. In another fifty years everyone may be more understanding about gay marriage but only time will tell what the future holds in store for legalizing gay marriage. 

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